Thursday, January 25, 2007

Droplets on your Toilet Seat


I walked into the restroom at my workplace the other evening only to find a rather wet toilet seat. Now, you probably know by now, especially so if you are a girl, how terribly annoying that is! And what makes it worse is not knowing whose droplets they are! That doesn't mean that it is particularly pleasant to know exactly who left the droplets behind... but there is an absolute-disgust-factor (if such a thing exists) that is added when you don't know the person!

But since I was in a rather philosophical mood that evening I made up a quote. My very own first quote! The kind that I hope someday will appear on the foreword of some best-seller.

"The droplets on your toilet seat shall bother you much less if you have enough toilet paper to wipe them away."

That done, I really needed to find a way to interpret it. I mean it had to convey more than just what it literally meant! I happen to know some cool Marathi proverbs, which sound absolutely vulgar but make a lot of sense, once you see them in the right light. For example, there is "लाडका लेक देवडी वर हागे, आन् ढुंगण पुसायला महादेव मागे!" Literally translated, that means, "Your favorite son empties his bowels on the porch and you have God stand by to clean his behind when he is done." This one is used when you want say that somebody is really spoilt. I am sure you agree that it conveys the idea more forcefully than if you said "Dear Lord! Look at that pampered brat!"

Coming back to my quote, one way you could think about it is, your shortcomings shall not bother you so much if you have the will to overcome them. Of course, that one is just boring! In the present generation, it makes more sense to interpret it as, your shortcomings shall not bother you so much if you have enough money to make others forget them.

In any case, I am hoping to see this quote in print... at least in somebody's statement of purpose when they apply to some college. I am certain that someone, someday will be able to decipher the true meaning in my words, and will thank me profusely for showing them the light! And will also, hopefully, tell me what I meant.